Two years later......

I honestly have no idea what has possessed me to write again.  It's summer and I have time to think.  My life isn't moving a hundred miles an hour.  I probably won't do it for another two years after this one.

Two years later and....
- it all seems like a blur.
- it all seems surreal.
- I feel like I had two lives that are completely disconnected.
- I have a job now that I enjoy.
- I actually sort of, kind of, some of the time like the small town I grew up in.
But.....
- I miss people.
- I miss the community.
- I miss the wisdom of my supervisors.
- I miss living almost every second with one person.

Don't get me wrong.  There were PLENTY of days where I wanted to throw in the towel.  The idea of coming home was the most amazing thought.  I entertained the idea a lot.  And I really don't think I would move back this second if given the opportunity.  I know that I cannot recreate what we had.  Most of the people have moved on.

But sometimes I just can't stop myself from wondering... is this, now, what I truly need to be doing?  Am I settling?  Am I getting comfortable?  Is that such a bad thing?  Is there something better?  Or what is best?  How do I know?  

Being overseas, I was an anomaly.  Somehow, it's easier being an anomaly overseas than here.  At least there, by very definition of an expat, I was strange.  Here, I'm not an anomaly by choice.  Somehow that makes it different.

I don't know the answers to any of these questions.
Any other former expat ever feel this way?